Airspeed: Speed of an airplane. Deduct 25% when listening to a Navy pilot.
Bank: The folks who hold the lien on most pilots’ cars.
Cone of Confusion: An area about the size of New Jersey, located near the final approach beacon at an airport.
Crab: The squadron Ops Officer.
Dead Reckoning: You reckon correctly, or you are.
Engine Failure: A condition which occurs when all fuel tanks mysteriously become filled with air.
Firewall: Section of the aircraft specially designed to let heat and smoke enter the cockpit.
Glide Distance: Half the distance from the airplane to the nearest emergency landing field.
Hydroplane: An airplane designed to land on a 20,000 foot long wet runway.
IFR: A method of flying by needle and ripcord.
Lean Mixture: Nonalcoholic beer
Nanosecond: Time delay built into the stall warning system.
Parasitic Drag: A pilot who bums a ride and complains about the service.
Range: Usually about 30 miles beyond the point where all fuel tanks fill with air.
Rich Mixture: What you order at the other guy’s promotion party.
Roger: Used when you’re not sure what else to say.
Service Ceiling: Altitude at which cabin crews can serve drinks.
Spoilers: The Federal Aviation Administration.
Stall: Technique used to explain to the bank why you car payment is late.