Let us know if we have left any out!
- AA (American Airlines) – Always Awful
- AI (Air India) – Allah Informed
- ALITALIA – Always Late In Takeoff Always Late In Arrival, Air Line In Tokyo And Luggage In Amsterdam
- BOAC (British Overseas Airways Corp.) – Better On A Camel, Bloody Old and Careless
- CA (China Airlines) – Choose Another
- CAAC (Civil Aviation Authority of China ?) – Chinese Airline Always Canceled, China Airlines Almost (Always) Crashes
- CPA (Canadian Airl.Intl.) – Can’t Promise Anything (New code CAI) – Crash And Ignite, Call Ambulance Immediately, Circle Airport Indefinitely, Cruise Above Iceland, Cancel Alaskan Itinerary, Call Attendants "Idiots," Check All Items, Copilots Are Imbeciles, Casual Atmosphere Inside
- DELTA – Don’t Even Leave The Airport, Don’t Ever Leave The Airport, Don’t Even Let Them Aboard (referring to the arabs?), Departing Even Later Than Anticipated
- EAL (Eastern) – Eastern’s Always Late
- ELAL – Every Landing Always Late
- JAT (Yugoslav Airlines)- Joke About Time
- KLM = Koop Lockheed Majesteit (Buy Lockheed, Your majesty, after the Lockheed bribe scandal which involved HRH Prince Bernhard of the Netherlands)
- LOT (Polish Airlines) – Last One There, Luggage On Tarmack (wave ‘bye!)
- LUFTHANSA – Let Us Fuck The Horses, Are No Stewardesses Available
- PA (Philippine Airways)- Please Avoid
- PAL (Phil. Airlines) – Philippines Always Late
- PAN AM – Plan On Arriving Nervewracked And Mad
- PIA (Pakistan Intl.Airl) – Please Inform Allah, Panic In Air, Perhaps I Arrive
- SABENA (Belgium) – Such A Bloody Experience, Never Again, Such A Bad Experience, Never Again
- SAHSA (Servicio Aero Honduras SA) – Stay At Home, Stay Alive
- SAS (Scandinavian Airl. System) – Sweet And Sexy, Sex And Service
- SIA (Singapore Intl.Airl.) – So Incredible, Aah
- TACA – Take A Chance Airline
- TAP (Portuguese Airl.) – Take Another Plane
- TRANSAVIA – To Rape A New Stewardess After V1 Is Allowed.
- TWA (Transworld Airl.) – Travel Without Arrival, Try Walking, Asshole , Try Walking Again, The Worst Airline, Took Wrong Airline, Try Walking Across (transatlantic perspective), Travel With Arabs, Terrorist Welcome Aboard, Terrorists With Arms, Teenie Weenie Airlines, Traveling Without Air, Tiny Wings Aflappin , Time Waste Airlines
- Usair – Unfortunately, Still Alleghany In Reality
DELTA: Driving Every Loyal Traveler Away
^ My fave 😉
KLM – sorry this one only works in Dutch.
Knonw by its employees as
Klein Loon Maatschappij (=Small Pay Company)
Heel grappig. Dank je wel! 🙂
KLOTE LUCHTVAART MAATSCHAPPIJ
QANTAS – Queer And Nasty, Try Another Service
I was told some of these a few years ago and had forgotten the excellent Sabena one amongst others, but I do recall
KLM="Kills, Lames, Maims"
BA="Bloody Awful"
TWA= Top Wop Aboard
JAL=Jeopardizes All Lives
LION Late Is Our Nature
AIRLINE ABBREVIATIONS AND THEIR MEANINGS
Heaven in European Aviation is when the Pilot is German, the Air Traffic Controller is British, the Cook is French, the Lover ltalian and it’s all organized by a Swiss.
Hell in European Aviation is when the Pilot is French, the Air Traffic Controller is German, the Cook is British, the Lover is Swiss and it’s all organized by an Italian.
ATP (British Aerospace Advanced Technology Plane)
Advanced Transport Problems
Always Technical Problems Another Terrible Plane
EROPS (Extended Range Operations)
Engines Running Or Passengers Swimming
SAAB (Swedish Aircraft Manufacturer)
Send Another Aircraft Behind
AEROFLOT (Soviet Airlines)
An Extensive Russian Offer From Land Of Tundra
AEF (Aero Lloyd)
Abenteuer Erlebnis Flug
AIR FRANCE (French National Carrier)
All Intelligents Restrain From Releaving Air-france’s Nasty Concorde Experiments
Air France – Air Chance
AF (Air France)
Attention Forrest РAttention Forr̻t
ALIA (Royal Jordanian Airlines)
Always Late In Arrival
ALITALIA (Italy’s World Airline)
Always Late In Take-off And Late ln Arrival
Am Landed In Tokyo And Luggage ln Africa
AUA (Austrian Airlines)
Absolut Unterbezahlte Angestellte
Absolutely Unnecessary Airline
Alles Uralte Airhostessen
Always Under Alcohol
Another Useless Airline
Aussteigen Umsteigen Autobus
BEA (British European Airways, now part of British Airways)
Back Every Afternoon
Better Eat Afterwards
Britain’s Excuse for an Airline
BOAC (British Overseas Airways Corporation, now part of British Airways)
Bend Over Again Christine
Best Organized Air Crash
Better On A Camel
Better Organized After Christmas
BA (British Airways)
Bloody Awful
BWIA (British West Indian Airways)
British Worst Investment Abroad
CAA (Civil Aviation Authority (UK))
Campaign Against Aviation
CPA (Canadian Pacific Air, now Canadian Airlines International)
Coins and Pennies Accepted
CAAC (Airline of the People’s Republic of China)
Cancel At All Cost
China Airways Always Cancelled
Crash All Around China
CONDOR (German Charter Airline)
Company Of Neckermann, Delays On Request
CROSSAIR (Swiss Regional Airline)
Company Running Only Sex Starved AIRhostesses
Company Running On Suter’s Stupid And Idiot Rules
DAN AIR
Day And Night : Aircraft Irregular Rotation
Dispensation Always Necessary
DELTA (Delta Air Lines)
Don’t Ever Leave The Airport
DLH (Deutsche Lufthansa)
Deutsche Luft-Hopser
Drives Like Hell
DLT (German Regional Carrier)
Der Letzte Trouble
Deutsche Luft Tragödie
Deutscher Leichen Transport
Deutscher Lust Transport
EL AL (Israel Airlines)
Entführer Landen Als Leichen
Every Landing Always Late
Every Luggage Always Lost
FINNAIR (Finnish Airlines)
Flying ls Nothing, Nourishing Altitude Is Revolutionary
GARUDA (Indonesian Airways)
Good And Reliable Under Dutch Administration
IBERIA (Spanish Airlines)
I Buy Engines Repaired In’ Africa
Im Bruch Erfahren, Routiniert Im Absturz
JAL (Japan Air Lines)
Jede Andere Lieber
Joins Always Late
JAT (Yugoslav Airlines)
Jesus And Tito
Jesus Attends Take-off
Jet Assisted Trial
Joke About Time
KLM (Royal Dutch Airlines)
Keep Loving Me
Keine Lust Mehr
Keiner Liebt Mich
Kenner Lieben Mollige
Königliche Lust-Molche
Komm Lieber Morgen
LAA (Libyan Arab Airlines)
Leave Arabs Alone
Libyans Are Angry
LAM (Linhas Aéreas de Moçambique)
Last Available Maintenance
LAN (Airlines of Chile)
Love After Noon
LAUDA (Austria’s Independent Airline)
Lieber Auf Umwegen, Dann Abwarten
Like Always : Unfriendly Dull Airline
LOT (Polish Airlines)
Lack Of Technology
Landing On Tempelhof
Lashing Of Turbulence
Liebe Ohne Tragflãchen
Lots Of Time
Lots Of Trouble
LTE (Internacional Airways)
Late Take-off Expected
LTS (Luft-Transport Süd (LTU Subsidiary))
Later Than Schedule
LTU (German Charter Airline)
Later Than Usual
Läßt Touristen Umherstehen
Landes-Trottel-Union
Lauter Trottel Unterwegs
Lieber Tot Umfallen
LUFTHANSA (Deutsche Lufthansa – German Airlines)
Let Us Fuck The Hostess As No Steward Available
Lousy Useless Fucking Terrible Hopeless Airline Never Stays Airborne
MEA (Middle East Airlines)
Most Empty Airline
Most Explosive Airline
NWA (Northwest Airlines)
Never Will Arrive
NFD (Nürnberger Flugdienst)
Nix Für Dumme
Nobody Flies Deeper
Nur Für Dumme
OLYMPIC (Greek Airline)
Onassis Liked Your Money Paid In Cash
PAA (Pan American World Airways)
Papa’s Ageing Aircraft
Papa’s Ageing Airline
Prostitutes Always Available
Prefer Another Airline
PAN AM (Pan American World Airways)
Passengers Are Not Allowed Mating
Pilots Ain’t Navigating Any More
PAL (Philippine Airlines
Plane Always Late
PIA (Pakistan Internacional Airlines)
Perhaps I’ll Arrive
Please Inform Allah
AI (Air India)
Allah Informed
QANTAS (of Australia)
Queer And Nice Type Air Steward
Queers And Nymphomaniacs Trained As Stewards
Quite A Nice Take-off. Any Survivors ?
SAA (South African Airways)
Seating Accommodation Available
SAS (Scandinavian Airline System)
Same As Sabena
Scandinavian – Yes * Airline Maybe * System No
Scandinavian Alcoholic System
Scandinavians Are Sexy
Scandinavians Are Sweet
Scotch And Soda
Sex After Service
Sex After Six
Sex And Satisfaction
Stewardesses Are Stupid
Stone Age Service
Such Accuracy Surprises
Sweet And Sexy
SABENA (Belgian World Airlines)
Sauf Accident Bien Entendu Nous Arriverons
Such A Beauty, Every Night Action
Such A Bloody Experience Never Again
SPANTAX (Spanish Charter Airline)
Sincere Prayers Are Necessary, Transporting Always Xenophobes
SWISSAIR (The Airline of Switzerland)
Sex Without Interruption Swiftly Served At lATA Rates
Sexy Women In Swissair Service Are Indeed Rare
Sie Werden Immer So Schuften, Sogar Im Ruhestand
Sie Werden Immer Schuften, Sogar An Ihrem Ruhetag
TAP (The Airline Of Portugal)
Take Another Plane
Transportes Aéreos Pré-historicos
Transportes Assim, Porra !
Transportes Atrasados Permanentemente
Try Another Portuguese
TAROM (Romanian Air Transport)
Take-off Aborted. Reason : Overloaded Machine
TIA (Trens International Airlines)
Travel In Agony
TMA (Trans Mediterranean Airlines)
Takes your Money Away
Trans Müll-Abfuhr
TWA (Trans World Airlines)
Take Waste Away
Terrific Women Aboard
Terrorism Wins Again
Thanks for Waiting Awhile
The Worst Adventure
Thousands Wondering Aimlessly
Transport Without Assistance
Travel With American
Travel With Angels
Try Wait Awhile
Try Walking Across
Tuesday Wednesday Anyday
Two Weeks After
UAA (United Arab Airlines (now Egyptair))
Use Another Airline
UL (Air Lanka)
Usually Late
UTA (Union des Transports Aeriens (formerly a French Independent))
Une Triste Affaire
Unknown Transport Ahead
VARIG (Airlines of Brazil)
Various Arrivals Repeated In General
Virgins Are Rare In Germany
YP (Aero LLoyd)
Your Problem
GARUDA – Good And Reliable Until Delay Announced
DELTA – Diverted Everyone’s Luggage To Atlanta
US AIR – Underwater Seats Available In Rear (refers to Captain Sullenberger’s ditching in the Hudson River—the airplane began filling up with water and the seats in the rear of the cabin were submerged)
ONA (Overseas National Airways) – Often Never Arrives – or Oh Never Again
FINNAIR – Flying Is Normally to the North Above Innumerable Reindeer
Anything for United Airlines (UAL)?
Eastern Air Lines (EAL)?
QANTAS – Quite A Nice Trip All Survived